Robbed! Robbed, I was! By no-good thieves, I tells ya...they came in the thick of night, as our train rolled along from irkutsk to ulan-ude, and snuck into my compartment, a whole stealthy group of them (deadly ninja assasins, i think, but i was fast asleep, so i don't know for sure), and they took my stuff.

they were able to take my beloved iPod, my camera, my gameboy advance, and the five dollar travel alarm clock that i'd taken with me everywhere since i first started road-trippin' around the USA 14 years ago for two main reasons: i am a very heavy sleeper, and i had a compartment of my own thanks to a suggestion by amanda and annette and a little bit of old-fashioned cash bribery on my part.

so we were in irkutsk, where this journal last heard me writing to you, two or three days ago (i've lost all track of time after spending eight of the past nine nights on trains), and we were preparing to roll out of the station at about 9 p.m. amanda and annette were being vocally demonstrative in anticipation of their presumed displeasure with the night's sleeping arrangements, lamenting the fact that they would be subjected once again to me, or, as they sometimes call me, the Great Snoreasaurus. we lugged our luggage into our compartment, sweaty and worn out because it's like a million degrees in the compartments, and they set out while i sat down and closed my eyes for a minute. they returned a few minutes later with a suggestion: why don't you go sleep in one of the empty compartments down the way, they asked me. i was up for it: if there was an empty compartment, why not let me use it? that way we'd all have a bit more room and the deep bass of my snoring would bounce off empty walls instead of the awakened forms of my near and dear friends.

i trudged down the narrow hallway with my stuff until i got to an empty compartment. i organized my stuff and was enjoying sitting there, watching the dascha (russian summer houses on the outskirts of a city) roll by as we chugged our way (in an electric train) out of irkutsk. the car attendant lady came into my room a few minutes later to check my ticket. she spoke no english, but indicated that i'd have to go back to my proper carriage. i had been in the midst of separating out some ten-ruble notes to keep as cheap souveniers for the folks back home, so i motioned towards the empty berths all around me and said (in english for some reason) why can't i stay here? then i raised an eyebrow and offered her the wad of ten-ruble bills (26 rubles = one dollar, by the way). she laughed dismissively since i was offering her like only a few dollars. a cool breeze brushed against my sweaty forehead and i really wanted to stay in that room, so i opened my wallet and busted out a 1000 ruble note (about $40), which cinched the deal. she grabbed the money and hurried off to her little office compartment to check on which compartments would be empty for the remainder of the two-day trip into ulan bataar, mongolia.

i ended up in the compartment next to the one i'd been in, so i had to move all my stuff again, but i did so willingly. amanda and annette came by and chatted for a few hours and before we knew it, it was three in the morning and we were all tired. they went back to their compartment, happy i'm sure that they'd be getting a good night's sleep, and i went to bed in mine, not knowing that the compartment's sliding doors had locks on them.

a few hours later it was morning and i was awakened by the carriage attendant, who was motioning for me to gather up my stuff - and fast! she grabbed some stuff, i grabbed some stuff, and i assumed i was being sent back to amanda and annette's compartment. as i walked with my backpack and whatnot down the hall, however, i saw that i was being moved into a compartment two doors down. apparently, the one i'd been in was being used after all. a dozen british and australian tourists got on the train and talked and talked and talked, really loudly. i tried to go back to sleep, by they just kept carrying on about this and that right outside my door. i sat up and saw that my headphones were sitting on the table in the middle of the compartment, between the two bottom berths, but the ipod that should have been attached to them was nowhere to be found! fudge, i said aloud. i searched for it all throughout the stuff that we'd haphazardly thrown into my new compartment, but to no avail. then i noticed that i couldn't find my camera, game boy, or the little clock. fudge, i said again, and set out to report the loss to the carriage lady. i used my mighty skills of pantomime to update her on the situation, and she accompanied me back to the compartment and started looking through my big rolling duffel bag and my backpack, as if i'd stuffed the items in there amongst the dirty clothes.

some of the british people overheard the commotion and sauntered by to see what was up, and i heard them saying "it appears our american friend here has been robbed!" another said "by god!" "how awful!" and other stuff like that. the people who were now inhabiting the compartment in which i'd spent the night tore it apart looking for the items, but to no avail. everyone in the train car expressed their condolences to me. i waited for them to start a collection, but none ever materialized. a mongolian lady who was in the compartment with amanda and annette said she hoped this wouldn't reflect poorly on mongolian people, because she'd ridden the train a plethora of times and hadn't ever heard of any robberies before.

i went back to sleep, cutting my losses, knowing that i wouldn't get my stuff back, wondering if the compartment lady had stolen them, kicking myself for leaving them out on the table (although who woulda thunk?) and for not locking the door. i looked on the bright side:
*they hadn't taken my video camera, which has hours of footage from the trip so far
*in the video camera bag was my camera's memory card, filled with the trips first 300 photos...these are worth more than a camera any day, and i was fortunate to have changed memory cards only a few days prior
*they hadn't taken my wallet
*they hadn't taken my passport

it was the last one that was really fortunate: cameras and ipods and game boys can be easily replaced, credit cards can be cancelled, but a lost passport would have stranded me in russia and most likely necessitated a trip back to moscow or wherever the nearest US embassy was to clear up the situation. so i was bummed about the robbery, but relieved that it hadn't been worse. i fell back asleep and slumbered on until noon -- this time with the door locked.